Happy 19th Birthday .. =)

A big shout out Thanks to all those that wished me Happy Birthday .. Really appreciated your wishes .. =D .. Well I'm really happy for this year's birthday, even though I did not organise any party this year .. I guess this year it's not that happening .. =) .. But still it was a good birthday thou .. =D ..

Well I recall the past I used to go cc and game it all out during eve of merdeka then head home for party and all .. But this year it's all plain .. =D .. But I had lunch with my uncle and his family and my mum .. This is the first time I had lunch at TGIF, the food there was quite filling and the best part is the birthday wishes from them .. =) .. Well it was kinda cool, when they have their birthday song and their birthday chant for their customer .. Haha .. =D .. We went to TGIF in Wangsa Walk - new mall near my house .. =D .. Wangsa Walk is pretty small but I hope it's going to be happening and it will be a good palce to hang out .. =) ..

Well after lunch went back home and get some rest .. =D .. Then had dinner with my kai jie and mum .. Dinner was good as well .. So this was my birthday for this year .. Slow pace and steady but all good .. =D .. Maybe it is because had too much fun in penang so not really in the mood to make it a blast for my birthday .. =D ..

I need to get back to my studies .. It's a good start I suppose .. I'm 19 now .. A year older, got to be more matured now .. Hell Yeah .. Alright that's all for now .. Ciaoz .. =D ..

Penang .. =D ..

Heyz .. I'm back from Penang .. Had loads of fun in Penang .. =D .. I will upload the pictures pretty soon once i get the pictures from Kev .. =) ..

Well the trip to Penang was pretty fast .. We were gambling playing cards all the way till Penang from Pudu Bus Station .. Roflmao .. Haha .. It's been awhile since I last went to Penang, and it's completly different I suppose .. xD .. The funny thing is the moment we enter Penang Island, it started to rain .. The rain never stopped even when we left Penang .. I think Penang hates us .. Lol ..

The food in Penang is not as good we thought .. Maybe the good food in Penang is hidden .. Lol .. Indeed we need a penangnite to guide us around if we crave for good food .. =D .. But still I like the fried oyster from one of the shops in penang .. =D ..

Basically what we did in Penang was food, gamble & drink .. The only places that we visited in Penang was Kek Lok Si (pretty famous temple), gurney drive and batu feringgi .. These are the only places as the rain was pretty heavy and damn potong .. Lol .. We also had some issues in renting a car which delayed us from visiting around Penang ..

Hmm .. Pretty tired for now .. I guess I should just sleep .. Pretty lazy to update .. So till then .. =D .. Buh Bye ..

p/s : Did some changes .. =D ..

Assignments .. =D

Sorry for the lack of updates .. Was rushing my assignments even it's due next week .. I was rushing cause I'll be leaving for Penang this Thursday and be back this Saturday .. So I don't think I will have sufficient time to finish up my stuff if I don't do it before I leave for Penang .. Well It's 70% done and I hope I can finish it by today ..

Well there are things I would like to comment .. For those who felt it, I don't give a shit about you .. You can call me names or whatsoever or draw a line with me go ahead .. I'm just being straightforward here and I'm actually helping you all in your future undertakings (*indirectly*) .. Seriously cause it is not that whether I'm selfish or I'm being arrogant, cause I'm not that smart as you all think .. I know what I can do, and I'm just only learning new stuffs day by day .. I'm just the same as everyone out there and trying to improve myself from day by day ..

I can guide you on how to do the assignments but I have limited knowledge as well, I can only teach you what I know and I can't go beyond that .. I wouldn't restrict myself from sharing my knowledge with you people out there .. But if you were to request my assignments and ask to take a look it .. I could only turn you down .. I'm being biased here cause I only share assignments with those who are close with me and they know who they are (*winks*) .. I trust them more than I trust my new uni mates .. I mean not all my uni mates are like this only some have intentions to just be friends .. Seriously yeah, it's pretty obvious when you want something from me, that's what we all do at all times isn't it ?? You want something from others, you approach them and intend to get something from them .. I've been through these shits and I've went through worse shits and I know things pretty well .. So cheers .. =D .. So if you are truly my friend you would understand me .. =D ..

Well the fact is most of us here are pretty tied up to instructions they follow them blindly .. If it says A you will do A .. Even if A is wrong you still follow .. Come on why do you have to stick to instructions so blindly .. When it says at least 4 pages, you don't come and ask me I need to do 4 only right ?? Cause it's pretty annoying, you can do either don't do any or you can do 1000 pages cause everything is up to you .. You determine your marks, your future .. Not me .. I don't shape your future .. I'm not God cause even God don't shape your future, we are the ones who shape our own future .. It all comes to you in everything you do, whether it is the past, present or future .. It's all you .. You don't blame others but blame yourself for all your doings, you don't say damn he/she took my gf/bf, he/she back stab me, blame the parents for this and that (we should appreciate them for good ) or whatever shits that we use to blame it on others .. Some even blame their friends for leading them to smoking, drugs and so on .. Peer pressure my ass seriously !! Like I said it all comes to oneself in everything they do .. =) ..

So enough said .. It's always best to be independent and only seek help when it is needed .. Well I'm always here to lend a helping hand with limits of cause .. Yeah so .. Good luck in those who are doing assignments and have fun during the holidays .. Although it was suppose to be a study week break but I certainly blew it off .. Haha .. =) .. So I will be doing my report now .. I have to get my assignment done by today .. So signing off now .. Ciaoz .. =D ..

=/

It's pretty hard to control our emotions at times .. Wouldn't be amused if you see people around us emo once awhile .. Emotions control us all the time, which leads us to drastic actions .. =/ .. Being cool at times do help a little bit, hiding emotions is the worst I can do .. Sometimes it's good that if someone out there reach out to our problems and is there to talk to us .. Anyone would do of cause, as long as we feel comfortable talking to them .. =) ..

Well, I don't really let my emotions out .. It's pretty sucked up if I let them go, I myself don't even dare to look at the mirror if I let them go .. =/ .. It is always the same old thing that makes me loose control .. I had great patience, but once I let loose that's it .. =/ .. I don't know why it has to be always the same god damn **** reason that provokes me .. I seriously ****ing hate it .. =/ ..

Why they like to assume, why they like to judge, why they like to compare, why they want to restrict me, why they are so ****ing scared, why they want to pressure me, why they don't keep their promises, why they want to **** me for the same reason all the time .. These are the questions that always disturbing me .. =/ .. I've been facing these questions since I was form 2 .. These things build me up for what I am today .. May it be a failure or a success, I always stay strong to prove them wrong ..

Well it happened again today .. Lucky I managed to stay cool and control my emotions .. =/ .. It's pretty tough to go through things by myself after so many years .. But again this toughen me up (TTFU - Toughen The **** Up) .. Lol .. Yeah, so what I want to do from now on is to really focus focus and focus .. That's all I can do for now base on my situation, is focus on studies .. That's what they always wanted, I shall fulfill my dreams and part of their dreams I suppose .. If they want to threathen me, I just have to obey what they say .. I can't afford to lose this golden opportunity .. =/ .. They are my platform to success, are my everything but and yet I don't know how to appreciate them as they always say I care for friends more than them .. It's not that I don't appreciate them, I'm not a person that show many feelings, I do love them very much but I don't know how to express to them, I don't know why, I tried but I couldn't ..

If I were to type it out big in font 72 saying that I love them a lot that doesn't show my love towards them isn't it ?? I've been appreciating them since the day I was born, I was not born with a silver spoon, but I never blame them for anything .. I understand them, I love them so much, but I don't just express to them .. I don't get them gifts for Mother's Day, Father's Day, don't get them birthday present .. I gave them shitty results, shitty attitude, burden, worries, disappoinments and everything not that always want .. It all comes to me when it comes to these stuffs, I choose them cause I was obligated and distracted by the computer .. Indeed, this is the problem that make the questions about arise .. Doubts and hatred against me .. =/ ..

Well, honestly the invention of computers brought disaster compared to benefits .. This is what they thought and many other parents out there think .. I'm 100% sure bout this and I'm not assuming .. I'm sure a lot of parents scold/nag or whatever shit they do to their children cause of the computer or whatsoever technology that makes them a suckass .. I don't want to further to comment anymore cause it seems illogical to say things bout technologies as a disaster .. =/ .. Think twice for those parents who state these stuffs .. =) ..

Well should be signing off by now .. Hope everything ends tonight .. =/ ..

Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can’t explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don’t want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My minds unweaving
Maybe it’s best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can’t explain what you can’t explain.
You're finding things that you didn’t know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My minds unweaving
Maybe it’s best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

[Chorus]
When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It’s too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Now I’m on my own side
It’s better than being on your side
It’s my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes

All these thoughts locked inside
Now you’re the first to know

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It’s too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends when darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It’s too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Tonight,
When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight.

=/ ..

The Reason .. =D

Pretty much an old song but still it's one of the best song that I've ever heard .. Just can't stop listening to it after MTV World Stage .. Love this song so much .. =D ..

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

p.s The Reason is you .. =) ..

MTV World Stage Rawks !!

Went to MTV World Stage yesterday .. It's really really awesome !!! It's consider my first time attending concert (went to MJ's concert when I was 6 or 7 .. Does that count cause I was sitting down .. xD)!! Legs are aching but still it's worth all the performance(Boys like Girls, Hoobastank, All American Reject!!) Pretty cool !! Woohoo ..

So I left house around 12 and reached there around 1 .. Got myself a valet parking cause it's more convenient and it's only rm8 .. I guess parking inside pyramid is also around that price .. So had lunch with Gavin and his friends .. After lunch went to Popular to read some books .. Was reading Cristiano Ronaldo's biography while waiting for Vic to come .. xÞ .. While it's pretty interesting bout Ronaldo, was hoping to get the book but it cause like rm100++ .. Pretty expensive .. Haha ..

After she arrived we went straight to lagoon .. Lagoon was packed with loads of people .. Mainly because of the MTV World Stage .. We managed to get a spot near the front line, view was pretty clear and station there for 7 hours .. Yeah .. Pretty crazy, we did not go for breaks and all .. Was pretty focus on all the performance .. =D .. Everything was all good, just that some retard Ms are pissing me off .. Bloody touching people and taking advantage on those foriegners .. Sigh .. = = .. Really typical Ms, making a fool of themselves and brand themselves as Malaysians .. **** .. =D ..

Something I noticed about the crowd there is they are pretty crazy, the jumps, the screams, the dance and everything .. Pretty interesting .. Haha .. Malaysians can sing pretty well, lol .. They can pronounce the lyrics pretty accurate, better than I do .. Lol .. Amazing, even those typical chinese and Ms, seriously they can sing along !! Owned .. Haha .. Claps for these people and I salute you guys .. =D .. Other than that, I can see people throw things here and there, bottles, fans .. LOL ..

I think I should be signing off for now .. Time to get back to study .. Haha .. Ciaoz .. and again MTV World Stage roxx .. =D ..

p/s : I had a good time despite the tiring legs and back pain .. =)

Test ???

First I went through the operation and I thought I was fit as fiddle, and now came flu, cough, fever .. What's next ?? Pretty pissed off with the condition I'm going through right now .. Is it a test from god or something ??

Currently, suffering from bad flu, serious cough which I can feel the pain rushing through my spines whenever I cough, headache that comes and goes, uncertain body temperature .. Pretty bad huh ?? But I'm still here standing strong, just hope that everything will be fine and I'm not caught up with H1N1 .. =) ..

Well from my point of view, people get sick cause they just don't sweat .. I used to exercise a lot, before the holidays started, I've not been exercising cause I was busy working and did not have the time to sweat it out .. The bloody toxins are all stranded inside me I suppose, which cause me to be sick .. With a "crippled" condition, I don't think I can do any exercise yet .. I want to end this predicament and walk out as a fresh and healthy student as soon as possible .. Will be back to swimming whenever my leg enables me to swim .. =D .. At least I'm sweating .. Haha ..

University workload is increasing day by day .. Test, assignments & homework building up and the dead line are pretty close if I'm not mistaken .. Working hard day by day to achieve what I want, just hope these predicament wouldn't bring down my momentum .. =D .. Barriers are always there to stop us from achieving what we wanted .. We ought to choose how to overcome the barrier, may it be pushing it aside, climbing over it, destroying it or whatsoever .. The result is we need to overcome it by another means, may it be hard but if we try I think we're able to overcome it ..

Well, I think this is some kind of test from god or maybe not ?? .. =/ .. Whatever is it, I will stand strong and fight for my dreams .. Only death can stop me from achieving my dreams, not any other things .. =) .. I don't want to be boasting/bragging, but sometimes there are things in me that gave me the strength, the momentum, the eagerness to achieve what I want .. You can call me stubborn but it sounds better if you say I have a strong determination .. So may it be you or me, I think we all will do anything we can to achieve what we always wanted .. *winks*

I guess I need to get some rest .. It's 1.30 a.m .. Nights 'n' Sweet Dreams .. Take care people, the weather out there is not good .. Everyday people just fall sick easily, drink more water and everything that suppose to be done to keep yourself healthy .. Signing Off with love and cheers .. =D ..

August .. =D

This is the month where I set everything .. My virtual timetable is out, goals have been set, targets are to be achieved and it starts today !! =D .. University life is pretty tough now, loads of homework, assignments & test !!!!

I really want to score an average of 90 if possible, by all means I suppose .. Just have to be really discipline in order to achieve what I want .. =D .. The reason is I really want to go to RMIT to do my remaining two years there .. Cause I think the lecturers in Melbourne itself is better than what I have here in Malaysia .. Cause the lecturers here are okay okay - close to suxxor .. xD .. and that's not only the reason I want to go over to Melbourne, is some sort of my dream to go overseas to study, so the sooner i go there the better .. =D ..

The condition to get my ass over there is to convince my parents that I'm eligible to go there .. I need to do really excellent for my 1st year to prove to them that I'm capable .. So I guess I have to do more than just typing out it here .. So yeah, from now is revision, revision & revision .. All I can say is less online and more to studies .. I'm slowly retiring from dota i suppose, it's pretty boring when my mates are not there to play with me .. So I think it's a good sign and a good start to get me focus on my studies .. =D ..

Well I guess, I should be signing off for now .. Just need to get sufficient sleep to stay alert in classes .. My leg is getting better I suppose, but my mum still insist that I use one crutch to go to classes .. Just hope I have to use till the end of this week, cause next week there's something nice going to happen !!! Woots .. =D .. Alright .. Nights people .. =D ..